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Yep. I totally saw MeatLoaf in concert last night and it was awesome! The dude is what, 66 years old and he can still put on a show. Granted, after 40 years of screaming into a microphone he just doesn’t have the vocal range he use to. Not that it mattered. He had a stellar band and his stories were awesome.

What, you don’t believe me?

…. well, I’d like to see you put on a 2 hour concert when you’re a senior citizen and end with a standing ovation.

But that wasn’t even the best part of the evening! Lets back track a little shall we?

Red was kind enough to pick me up and take me to the concert. Because EVERYTHING in this town happens on the Strip and me + drive + traffic + pedestrians + the Strip is a panic attack in the making.

~5:45 PM~
Red successfully found my house without getting lost this time. Hurray! We are now headed toward the expressway and the Las Vegas Strip.  We have 45min to get to the box office and pick up tickets. Plenty of time, right?

Me – If you take the Frank Sinatra Blvd exit, we can bypass the Strip traffic.

Red – That’s not what the GPS is telling me. I need to take Dean Martin Blvd.

Me – That’s on the other side of the road, going in the wrong direction. …I don’t think your GPS knows how to get there. …..and we just missed the exit.

Red – It’s fine, there’s not a lot of traffic. 

~6:00 PM~

Me – Oh! Take Flamingo Rd exit. We’ll get there in 10 mins.
Or not. Whatever, don’t listen to me then.

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This is the way GPS SHOULD have taken us

~6:08 PM

Red – Why is it having me get off at SAHARA?!? Oh my F***ing gawd!

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This is how the trip ACTUALLY went.

Me – Your GPS sucks at directions.

Red – NOT HELPING! Oh my gawd, we’re not going to make it. There is no F***ing way we’re going to make it!!!!!

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~6:25 PM~
We made it to Planet Hollywood, valeted the car and then ran all the way to the box office. Tickets secured with 5 mins to spare.

Although, I have never heard Red utter so many profanities in such a short amount of time

  • Gawd= 27 (a majority of these were preceded by “fuck” so it totally counts here)
  • Fuck =  18
  • Asshole = 5 (mostly in reference to her husband. And once to the cab driver that cut us off)
  • Mother Fucker = 3 (all directed at a black SUV that was determined to run us off the road)
  • Whore = 2
  • Bitch = 2
  • Dumbass = 1 (I think this one was me yelling at a pedestrian. I could be wrong though)